String theory explains Santa Claus
the globe delivering Christmas presents!”
Oedegaard believes that Santa saves time, energy, and air resistance by producing gifts out in space. A new snowboard or doll weights quite little when it is high above the Earth.
“Likewise, Santa Claus doesn’t travel in our four dimensions (remember that time is the fourth dimension), but makes use of some eleven dimensions. These dimensions make it quite easy to pick up gifts from his warehouse at the North Pole,” emphasizes Oedegaard, while Nils Lid Hjort and Gaute Einevoll feel that recent string-theory allows for the use of at least twenty-six dimensions.
The more dimensions, the easier to deliver gifts.
Einstein = Santa Claus?
Such physics are Gaute Einevoll’s specialty, and he brings a bold hypothesis to the table:
“We are talking about moving matter, and no one had more knowledge about matter than Albert Einstein. Do I need to point out that the disheveled physicist reminds many of Santa Claus? Einstein published his special theory of relativity in 1905 and his general theory of relativity in 1916, but after Coca-Cola more or less defined Santa’s ‘look’ in 1930, Einstein didn’t publish that much more. I have wondered if that’s because Einstein became Santa,” speculates Einevoll.
He believes that the reason that Einstein never was able to link together quantum theory and relativity is due to the fact that the famous tussled head was busy in secret helping Santa to become a kind of “Quanta Claus.”
Coincidence? Certainly not!
Santa Claus – a threat to the environment?
“Even though Santa uses both the ion-shield and travels between dimensions, the problem of air resistance remains,” allows astrophysicist Oedegaard.
“There are so many more people now, and so many more good children, that there are more gifts and thus more air resistance. Therefore, it is natural to explain the warming up of the polar region with all the extra heat that is released. But this problem will solve itself over time, because if children are too good, then all the ice at the North Pole melt. Then there will be no more winter, and thus no more Christmas.”
“This leads to a discussion of ‘the bad children problem’: Why do bad children also receive gifts and whether, out of respect for the environment, children should be a little more naughty — without creating more problems with discipline in school.”
Elf expert Ane Ohrvik believes we should turn it around. “Maybe Santa Clause should raise his standards?” she asks, and
